Lauren Allis
Thirty years ago, magicians came together to allow me to look like this... Magicians known as make-over artists, and photographers.
Twenty-five years ago, I was planning my transition. I began to contact counselors, physicians, and organizations to define my path. I had developed the plan, the timeframes, the steps (to the nth level of detail). All of my life, I turned to The Divine Master for guidance, help, and answers to my questions. Always, one of three possibilities were extended as answers to my petitions: YES; NO; Not Yet. (Please know that I did not always learn of the answers until later; sometimes much later!)
Twenty years ago I was hospitalized with what was later diagnosed as a blood clot. Eighteen years ago, I began therapy with a counselor, through the University of Michigan's Comprehensive Gender Services Program, and began to receive my regular medical care through the program. Seventeen years ago, I learned of a term "Deep Vein Thrombosis" that described a condition I had. Seventeen years ago I learned that I would never be a candidate for HRT. Seventeen years ago, I gave up my thoughts of SRS.
Seventeen years ago, my dreams, and my life, were shattered.
Seventeen years ago, I re-discovered a poem that was required reading in my high school College Prep English class:
Twenty-five years ago, I was planning my transition. I began to contact counselors, physicians, and organizations to define my path. I had developed the plan, the timeframes, the steps (to the nth level of detail). All of my life, I turned to The Divine Master for guidance, help, and answers to my questions. Always, one of three possibilities were extended as answers to my petitions: YES; NO; Not Yet. (Please know that I did not always learn of the answers until later; sometimes much later!)
Twenty years ago I was hospitalized with what was later diagnosed as a blood clot. Eighteen years ago, I began therapy with a counselor, through the University of Michigan's Comprehensive Gender Services Program, and began to receive my regular medical care through the program. Seventeen years ago, I learned of a term "Deep Vein Thrombosis" that described a condition I had. Seventeen years ago I learned that I would never be a candidate for HRT. Seventeen years ago, I gave up my thoughts of SRS.
Seventeen years ago, my dreams, and my life, were shattered.
Seventeen years ago, I re-discovered a poem that was required reading in my high school College Prep English class:
The Road Not Taken
Robert Frost
The Path of Life...  | Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both And be one traveler, long I stood And looked down one as far as I could To where it bent in the undergrowth; Then took the other, as just as fair, And having perhaps the better claim, Because it was grassy and wanted wear; Though as for that the passing there Had worn them really about the same, And both that morning equally lay In leaves no step had trodden black. Oh, I kept the first for another day! Yet knowing how way leads on to way, I doubted if I should ever come back. I shall be telling this with a sigh Somewhere ages and ages hence: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. |
Seventeen years ago, choices had to be made from a list of things that I had no control over.
Seventeen years ago, I accepted the fact that other things needed to be done in this lifetime; even though I had no idea what those things were.
Now, I am beginning to understand, but am still having a rough time accepting the fact that I could not "do it my way". Being human is the hardest part of this journey of my spirit.
It truly is inspiring to know that all things that happen in our lives (like the required reading in a high school class) can have such an impact later, and can allow us to accept things that occur. And to move forward with our lives!
I recently learned that a friend of mine uses a quote on her signature line that I really liked, as it is so applicable to life's journey:
“Life may not be the party we hoped for; but while we’re here, we should dance!”
Seventeen years ago, I accepted the fact that other things needed to be done in this lifetime; even though I had no idea what those things were.
Now, I am beginning to understand, but am still having a rough time accepting the fact that I could not "do it my way". Being human is the hardest part of this journey of my spirit.
It truly is inspiring to know that all things that happen in our lives (like the required reading in a high school class) can have such an impact later, and can allow us to accept things that occur. And to move forward with our lives!
I recently learned that a friend of mine uses a quote on her signature line that I really liked, as it is so applicable to life's journey:
“Life may not be the party we hoped for; but while we’re here, we should dance!”
