Book Reviews
Cameron Anderson
The Color of Sunlight is an intimate look at a deep and beautiful friendship that develops between a visiting nurse and a gravely ill blind transsexual woman.
The book succeeds brilliantly on this level but it also delves into the profound effects this relationship has on both women's lives. The nurse's life will be shaken to its very foundation as she accepts her patient's challenge to educate the world about a subject she previously knew next to nothing about. Meanwhile, the patient, who has been used and abused, learns what it feels like to be loved unconditionally.
As the inevitable end comes, a mystery that has been building gradually as the story unfolds, comes to a dramatic head.
Co-authors Michelle Alexander and Michelle Rose have produced a book that will leave readers stunned and shine a fresh ray of light on how it feels to be transgendered - and what it means to be human.
- Cami Anderson
The book succeeds brilliantly on this level but it also delves into the profound effects this relationship has on both women's lives. The nurse's life will be shaken to its very foundation as she accepts her patient's challenge to educate the world about a subject she previously knew next to nothing about. Meanwhile, the patient, who has been used and abused, learns what it feels like to be loved unconditionally.
As the inevitable end comes, a mystery that has been building gradually as the story unfolds, comes to a dramatic head.
Co-authors Michelle Alexander and Michelle Rose have produced a book that will leave readers stunned and shine a fresh ray of light on how it feels to be transgendered - and what it means to be human.
- Cami Anderson
Kelley Winters
This was posted on facebook by Kelley Winters! I had the opprtunity to meet her at Colorado Gold Rush and what a warm, loving woman she is! Michelle Alexander
Kelley Winters was so deeply moved by The Color of Sunlight, by Michelle Alexander and Michelle Rose. This is one of the most authentic, compelling and important narratives ever told within the transcommunity. It is a story of courage and tenacity in the face of unbelievable adversity. It is a story of compassion and love across vast differences. And it is a story of dignity for a community that hungers for hope. The Color of Sunlight should be required reading for everyone who might ever provide medical or mental health services to any trans or transsexual person. If you only read one book this month, make it this one. (If you read two, please consider reading mine too :-)
Kelley Winters was so deeply moved by The Color of Sunlight, by Michelle Alexander and Michelle Rose. This is one of the most authentic, compelling and important narratives ever told within the transcommunity. It is a story of courage and tenacity in the face of unbelievable adversity. It is a story of compassion and love across vast differences. And it is a story of dignity for a community that hungers for hope. The Color of Sunlight should be required reading for everyone who might ever provide medical or mental health services to any trans or transsexual person. If you only read one book this month, make it this one. (If you read two, please consider reading mine too :-)
Ken Dollarhide
This book review was written by Dr. Kenneth Dollarhide: I think that it is just wonderful how everyone that is reading the book, is getting the many messages that it has!! Michelle Alexander
I have perhaps around 100 biographies from the Roberta Cowell's Story, April Ashley's Odyssey, Nancy Hunt, Mirror Image, Canary by Canary Conn, etc....as well as many of the current biography's....
However, they all pale when I began reading, The Color of Sunlight (though I cannot read a page without tears in my eyes).
The Color of Sunlight is the story of two very remarkable women both of whom were living in Kalispell, Montana. Mishelle, a blind transgender woman with a terminal illness and her home care nurse, also named Michelle, who before working with Mischelle had never known a transgender person.
This beautiful book tells the story of a unique and spiritual relationship. Michelle, the nurse has her eyes opened by Mishelle, a blind transgender woman, who when asked by Michelle why she was in Kalispell answered, “I was put here to educate others about transgender people.” (p.51) Mishelle, the blind transgender woman, the rejected outsider, discovers in the last few months of her life, the love of a family and total acceptance – playing chess with Michelle’s husband, teaching Michelle’s youngest son to use her brailler and soaking in the family Jacuzzi.
Mishelle was a woman who knew who she was and even more importantly understood herself in a profoundly spiritual way. She was someone who could see her own beauty and the beauty of other’s only in her mind’s eye. Michelle, the nurse, who is so much more than ‘just’ a nurse, she gave a very complicated woman back her life, a remarkable gift and in the process learned that gender exists in the mind and heart, gender is who you are. Ironically, after the death of Mishelle, it is Michelle who is the one who now educates others about transgender people and this book is a beautiful beginning co-written with another remarkable woman, Michelle Diane Rose.
Michelle Alexander, really, really get's it. She understands so well. Mishelle was a great teacher I wish I could have known her....one of the most powerful statements she makes is on p.153 "I realize that I had to learn to forgive all the ones who bruised me and left scars on me, real and otherwise...." This statement I found terrifying and profoundly spiritual. Here was a woman who knew who she was and even more importantly understood herself in a profoundly spiritual way. Someone who could only see her own beauty in her mind's eye. I fell in love with this complicated woman and with Michelle, who may think she is a only a nurse but is much more than that: she gave complicated woman, her life, a remarkable gift, and in the process learned that gender does not exist between the legs but in the mind and heart.
Thank you both for telling me about this special book.
I have perhaps around 100 biographies from the Roberta Cowell's Story, April Ashley's Odyssey, Nancy Hunt, Mirror Image, Canary by Canary Conn, etc....as well as many of the current biography's....
However, they all pale when I began reading, The Color of Sunlight (though I cannot read a page without tears in my eyes).
The Color of Sunlight is the story of two very remarkable women both of whom were living in Kalispell, Montana. Mishelle, a blind transgender woman with a terminal illness and her home care nurse, also named Michelle, who before working with Mischelle had never known a transgender person.
This beautiful book tells the story of a unique and spiritual relationship. Michelle, the nurse has her eyes opened by Mishelle, a blind transgender woman, who when asked by Michelle why she was in Kalispell answered, “I was put here to educate others about transgender people.” (p.51) Mishelle, the blind transgender woman, the rejected outsider, discovers in the last few months of her life, the love of a family and total acceptance – playing chess with Michelle’s husband, teaching Michelle’s youngest son to use her brailler and soaking in the family Jacuzzi.
Mishelle was a woman who knew who she was and even more importantly understood herself in a profoundly spiritual way. She was someone who could see her own beauty and the beauty of other’s only in her mind’s eye. Michelle, the nurse, who is so much more than ‘just’ a nurse, she gave a very complicated woman back her life, a remarkable gift and in the process learned that gender exists in the mind and heart, gender is who you are. Ironically, after the death of Mishelle, it is Michelle who is the one who now educates others about transgender people and this book is a beautiful beginning co-written with another remarkable woman, Michelle Diane Rose.
Michelle Alexander, really, really get's it. She understands so well. Mishelle was a great teacher I wish I could have known her....one of the most powerful statements she makes is on p.153 "I realize that I had to learn to forgive all the ones who bruised me and left scars on me, real and otherwise...." This statement I found terrifying and profoundly spiritual. Here was a woman who knew who she was and even more importantly understood herself in a profoundly spiritual way. Someone who could only see her own beauty in her mind's eye. I fell in love with this complicated woman and with Michelle, who may think she is a only a nurse but is much more than that: she gave complicated woman, her life, a remarkable gift, and in the process learned that gender does not exist between the legs but in the mind and heart.
Thank you both for telling me about this special book.
Markie Wenzel
Michelle, I just finished the book for the first time. I am awed by the story and the content, and the description of how Mishelle accepted herself, and transformed her outer shell and her inner being. I have done that in my life within the last year, as it is described on page 366. And that transformation in my life has revolutionized the content and quality of my life. I share many of the same experience in my life as Mishelle did in hers. I have come to understand it is just germain to a trans persons journey. The Story helped me to know I am human. I share the same feelings and thought processes and emotions both you and Michelle exhibited in the book. And I learned it's OK to be me. And live life and feel life; and be authentic in the process. And that it is not wrong to feel and exhibit emotions. God knows through the course of the Story I wept at least 48 times.
I am now surrendering to the inspiration and the calling to write my story , About My life and Gender Identity Journey. I want to call it "No More Secrets'. I want to tell my story, after reading About Mishelle, I know now is the time to get busy.
Anyhow, Michelle, thanks so much for the story, and making sure I had the importunity to read it.
I would like to stay in touch, and help promote the book any way I can.
I probably will read it several more times in he near future.
Love , Hugs, Peace, and Thanks
Markie
I am now surrendering to the inspiration and the calling to write my story , About My life and Gender Identity Journey. I want to call it "No More Secrets'. I want to tell my story, after reading About Mishelle, I know now is the time to get busy.
Anyhow, Michelle, thanks so much for the story, and making sure I had the importunity to read it.
I would like to stay in touch, and help promote the book any way I can.
I probably will read it several more times in he near future.
Love , Hugs, Peace, and Thanks
Markie
Mona Rae Mason
I have just finished reading "The Color of Sunlight" by Michelle Alexander, RN, and co-writer Michelle Rose. I happen to have had the great pleasure of meeting these two at The Empire Conference. It's a true story about a Montana nurse and her work with a blind and terminally-ill transgender woman and what they learn from each other. It's about friends---true friends. But it's also about family and faith. And while not every transgender person out there needs to read this book (but they should), their family and friends and co-workers most certainly should. It's emotional, inspirational, and educational, all in one. This is one beautiful story.
'The Color of Sunlight' gets 4 stars, from me at least. I checked and it is available at Amazon. Order a large box of tissues as well---you, your family and friends will need them.
Mona Rae Mason
'The Color of Sunlight' gets 4 stars, from me at least. I checked and it is available at Amazon. Order a large box of tissues as well---you, your family and friends will need them.
Mona Rae Mason
Ashton McNair
I just finished the book. It is such an amazing work of acceptance, love and compassion. I am so grateful to you and other allies who are courageous enough to share their stories. Mishelle would definitely be proud of the finished product!
I can't believe how much life you two shared in four and a half short months. This story has been an inspiration to me, and I hope to continue my journey with the grace that Mishelle did. I am glad to have you as an ally to help educate people on trans awareness.
Thank you sincerely, from the bottom of my heart,
Ashton McNair
I can't believe how much life you two shared in four and a half short months. This story has been an inspiration to me, and I hope to continue my journey with the grace that Mishelle did. I am glad to have you as an ally to help educate people on trans awareness.
Thank you sincerely, from the bottom of my heart,
Ashton McNair
Lynn Skinner
I am loving your book. WHY??? Because it is so real, honest, pure, informational, compassionate, loving, curious, observant, kind, confrontational, kindred, and accessible.
Maybe its because YOU are the light that has made these words shine.
Maybe its because YOU are the light that has made these words shine.
Susan Collins
I first heard of the book The Color of Sunlight while visiting my friend Cami in Harrisburg. She had a copy of the manuscript and was doing a grammar correction of the manuscript. She kept telling me how wonderful she thought the book was. As she got ready for work that evening, she offered me the box with the manuscript for me to read. “:Enjoy!” she said with a smile, and off she went to work.
I wasn’t sure if I should read it. After all, it was not published yet, and the authors had not given me permission …but I did open the box and turned a couple of pages into the book and read a paragraph. Then I leafed a few pages more and read another paragraph or two. And I did that a few more times and realized that this book spoke to me in some way.
So I went back to the beginning and started reading it. I got to page 50 about 1am on a Saturday night and started calling people I knew to tell them about this book I was reading, and must have left a few seemingly crazed messages for people, as I had become so fascinated by the story unfolding before me on these pages.
I got to the part of the book where Michelle is riding home from caring for her friend and stopped at a light and thought to herself: “How does Michelle know she is a woman? She is blind?” And she suddenly realized that gender is something that is inside a person. And as I read this, a tear trickled down my face, and with a small smile I said to the room and the world around me: “She gets it.”
I spent a most enjoyable night laughing and crying and feeling the loss of rejection that is so a part of our lives and was as such in this most memorable book.. And I grew to cherish this friendship that had grown between these two women, and felt such honor at being able to share their journey toward life’s end together.
I have gotten to know the two beautiful women who are responsible for creating such a beautiful work of art, and find them to be authentic human beings, people trying to figure out this vida loca the same as all of us, and am honored to call them “friend”.
I heartily recommend this book to any one. All people will find value in this journey of love kindled, this story of dignity found in the winter of life, this book titled The Color of Sunlight
Sue Collins
I wasn’t sure if I should read it. After all, it was not published yet, and the authors had not given me permission …but I did open the box and turned a couple of pages into the book and read a paragraph. Then I leafed a few pages more and read another paragraph or two. And I did that a few more times and realized that this book spoke to me in some way.
So I went back to the beginning and started reading it. I got to page 50 about 1am on a Saturday night and started calling people I knew to tell them about this book I was reading, and must have left a few seemingly crazed messages for people, as I had become so fascinated by the story unfolding before me on these pages.
I got to the part of the book where Michelle is riding home from caring for her friend and stopped at a light and thought to herself: “How does Michelle know she is a woman? She is blind?” And she suddenly realized that gender is something that is inside a person. And as I read this, a tear trickled down my face, and with a small smile I said to the room and the world around me: “She gets it.”
I spent a most enjoyable night laughing and crying and feeling the loss of rejection that is so a part of our lives and was as such in this most memorable book.. And I grew to cherish this friendship that had grown between these two women, and felt such honor at being able to share their journey toward life’s end together.
I have gotten to know the two beautiful women who are responsible for creating such a beautiful work of art, and find them to be authentic human beings, people trying to figure out this vida loca the same as all of us, and am honored to call them “friend”.
I heartily recommend this book to any one. All people will find value in this journey of love kindled, this story of dignity found in the winter of life, this book titled The Color of Sunlight
Sue Collins
Cherynn Williams
Dear Michelle,
I love to read books. I can’t tell you what’s popular on TV these days or what’s currently out at the movies but I can tell you I sit surrounded by over 700 books just in my front room. I love to read, so does the rest of my family.
I should've finished the book sooner than I did but more than once my eyes filled with tears and I had to withdraw myself from it to soak it all in. Some of the pages do have tear stains on them. More than once during my reading I wanted to reach out and give you a much-needed hug, I could feel your pain.
I never had the privilege of meeting Mishelle but through your words I feel I know her. She was alive in my front room as I tore through your book. The courage that she had in the face of such monumental obstacles and objections was super human. At times her will and perseverance shamed me. For the troubles I have encountered in my life that I thought were tragic they have no comparison to struggles she faced. She is an inspiration to me. After reading of her plight, I realize that my worst day was nothing more than a sunny afternoon without ice cream compared to hers. I don’t know that I would have her strength if our roles were reversed. She always kept plodding along, a force of one.
You also provided me with a view of myself from outside the TG community. I have always tried to have empathy for those on the other side of the fence, but all I can do is guess what’s in people’s minds. I applaud your strength and inquisitiveness to understand the things you do not, but you are an exception. I hope that never changes about you. I can tell that you have passed that quality onto your sons; you have a wonderful family and you should be proud of how you have raised them.
I have also highlighted a half-dozen sentences out of your book knowing that others in my family will be reading it in the future. The sentences I have marked are feelings I have and comments I myself have made in the past. I am hoping my family realizes that’s my way of saying I feel the same way. I do know that your book will help my mother understand a little more about who I am. I whole-heartedly thank you for that. I know that it won’t answer all her questions or address all of her concerns but it will help her to see that I am not a unique person. That I come from a sorority of challenged souls trying to make life right for themselves.
Your book will also demonstrate to my daughter the uphill battle she will face to overcome ignorance and bias within the medical profession. I feel she is aware of the fight she has undertaken but she is determined and a fighter. She is also one of my biggest advocates and proud to be my daughter. Everyone in her classes knows that her father is transgender and I feel sorry for those that make off-color remarks at my expense while in her presence. They will see the momma lion come out in her and feel her wrath. Both of my daughters are like that and I couldn’t ask God for better; I know how lucky I am. I still have ALL of my family with me while I make my transition; I wish that could've been the same for Mishelle. My family is important to me and I could feel her pain and isolation when she needed them most. It’s hard to imagine how things would have worked out for her if she had been in a nurturing environment, and had the support she truly needed in her life. I feel real pain within myself knowing that God chose her to travel that road so others could be educated, and learn from her experiences. I know God loved her dearly and had a lot of faith in her spirit to burden her with such a heavy load for the benefit of others. Why is pain humanities greatest teacher? We never seam to learn much from our successes but we learn volumes from our failures and struggles.
Thank you for being who you are. It truly is my honor to have met you and I thank you for your friendship. I know that your feelings for all of us TG people are sincere and it warms my heart knowing that you are on our side. You owe us nothing, and we owe you a lot. Thank also for sharing that brief part of your life with the world, I know your work will touch many souls for years to come.
And not to be a pain but, I know the title of your next book, "Crossing Boundaries". This time it should be your story: an autobiography. People like you are rare and I feel you can inspire a lot of folks in the future to act on what’s right, even if means disregarding the rules. You put yourself in professional peril by doing what you did and for all the right reasons, LOVE. Love, care and concern should be what motivates all of us even in times when it’s not convenient.
Thank you, again; you did touch my soul to its core.
I love to read books. I can’t tell you what’s popular on TV these days or what’s currently out at the movies but I can tell you I sit surrounded by over 700 books just in my front room. I love to read, so does the rest of my family.
I should've finished the book sooner than I did but more than once my eyes filled with tears and I had to withdraw myself from it to soak it all in. Some of the pages do have tear stains on them. More than once during my reading I wanted to reach out and give you a much-needed hug, I could feel your pain.
I never had the privilege of meeting Mishelle but through your words I feel I know her. She was alive in my front room as I tore through your book. The courage that she had in the face of such monumental obstacles and objections was super human. At times her will and perseverance shamed me. For the troubles I have encountered in my life that I thought were tragic they have no comparison to struggles she faced. She is an inspiration to me. After reading of her plight, I realize that my worst day was nothing more than a sunny afternoon without ice cream compared to hers. I don’t know that I would have her strength if our roles were reversed. She always kept plodding along, a force of one.
You also provided me with a view of myself from outside the TG community. I have always tried to have empathy for those on the other side of the fence, but all I can do is guess what’s in people’s minds. I applaud your strength and inquisitiveness to understand the things you do not, but you are an exception. I hope that never changes about you. I can tell that you have passed that quality onto your sons; you have a wonderful family and you should be proud of how you have raised them.
I have also highlighted a half-dozen sentences out of your book knowing that others in my family will be reading it in the future. The sentences I have marked are feelings I have and comments I myself have made in the past. I am hoping my family realizes that’s my way of saying I feel the same way. I do know that your book will help my mother understand a little more about who I am. I whole-heartedly thank you for that. I know that it won’t answer all her questions or address all of her concerns but it will help her to see that I am not a unique person. That I come from a sorority of challenged souls trying to make life right for themselves.
Your book will also demonstrate to my daughter the uphill battle she will face to overcome ignorance and bias within the medical profession. I feel she is aware of the fight she has undertaken but she is determined and a fighter. She is also one of my biggest advocates and proud to be my daughter. Everyone in her classes knows that her father is transgender and I feel sorry for those that make off-color remarks at my expense while in her presence. They will see the momma lion come out in her and feel her wrath. Both of my daughters are like that and I couldn’t ask God for better; I know how lucky I am. I still have ALL of my family with me while I make my transition; I wish that could've been the same for Mishelle. My family is important to me and I could feel her pain and isolation when she needed them most. It’s hard to imagine how things would have worked out for her if she had been in a nurturing environment, and had the support she truly needed in her life. I feel real pain within myself knowing that God chose her to travel that road so others could be educated, and learn from her experiences. I know God loved her dearly and had a lot of faith in her spirit to burden her with such a heavy load for the benefit of others. Why is pain humanities greatest teacher? We never seam to learn much from our successes but we learn volumes from our failures and struggles.
Thank you for being who you are. It truly is my honor to have met you and I thank you for your friendship. I know that your feelings for all of us TG people are sincere and it warms my heart knowing that you are on our side. You owe us nothing, and we owe you a lot. Thank also for sharing that brief part of your life with the world, I know your work will touch many souls for years to come.
And not to be a pain but, I know the title of your next book, "Crossing Boundaries". This time it should be your story: an autobiography. People like you are rare and I feel you can inspire a lot of folks in the future to act on what’s right, even if means disregarding the rules. You put yourself in professional peril by doing what you did and for all the right reasons, LOVE. Love, care and concern should be what motivates all of us even in times when it’s not convenient.
Thank you, again; you did touch my soul to its core.
Nadia Dewaele
Hi Michelle!
Being transgender myself, I recognized a lot that strokes with my own life in the book.
It was very touching to read and re-live some of the chapters. Sometimes it really gets to your hart and often tears where in my eyes.
It is a great example how life can change in a snap and how enormous the consequences can be.
Being transgender myself, I recognized a lot that strokes with my own life in the book.
It was very touching to read and re-live some of the chapters. Sometimes it really gets to your hart and often tears where in my eyes.
It is a great example how life can change in a snap and how enormous the consequences can be.
Jennifer A. Burnett, MS, MD, FAAFP
I have just recently finished the book, “The Color of Sunlight”, by Michelle Alexander and Michelle Rose. Not only was it wonderfully written and quite captivating, I was also very impressed by the depth of understanding that these authors showed regarding the plight of Mishelle- a blind transsexual woman nearing the end of her long struggle with an incurable lung disease. My vision was often clouded with tears as I progressed through the passages which described the incredible bond of love and compassion that developed between Nurse Alexander and her Home Health patient.
As a medical student, I was taught the importance of maintaining a “professional distance” between myself and my patients- not allowing myself to become emotionally attached to any particular “case” (and especially to those patients with a terminal disease). But Ms. Alexander demonstrated her willingness to go beyond what was expected of her professionally as a nurse; she was willing to risk her own heart and share of herself and her family in order to reach out to her patient and meet her special needs as she faced the swiftly-approaching end of her life. I commend both Michelle’s courage and humanity as one who far exceeded the requirements of her profession. She made the last few months of her patient’s life a joyous celebration of her uniqueness rather than the stress-filled and lonely demise that too often occur with such terminal diseases.
One especially important theme developed in this book is how Michelle had to overcome her preconceived notions of what Gender Identity Disorder/Transsexualism actually means. Society as a whole generally has great difficulty understanding that a person’s true gender (who they are “inside”- their mind, emotions and very soul) sometimes does not match with their “outward” sex. What it takes for a person with GID to grow up and then eventually “transition” to live as their true self is a very difficult and prolonged process. And considering her patient’s simultaneous struggle with blindness from early childhood, what this transwoman accomplished in her life is even more incredible! Ms Alexander’s account of her patient’s courage and determination is an inspiration for us all.
As a physician caring for transsexual patients, a university professor who lectures on this subject both in the US and abroad and as a transwoman myself- I applaud Ms. Alexander’s commitment to educating others about GID. She has given her readers a great example of how befriending such a patient-whose underlying gender “incongruity” was at first incomprehensible to her- enriched not only her own life but so many others, as well as us, her readers.
Finally, that which has been recently demonstrated by the rash of suicides among GLBT youth- the bigotry, verbal harassment and even overt violence that is routinely experienced by those of us who are “different”- has a prodigious impact on not only our own lives but tears at the fabric of our society as a whole. Unless there are far more people like Michelle Alexander ( and her co-author) who are willing to be promoters of change in people’s understanding and behavior towards transsexuals, such lamentable casualties as these will continue unabated.
Jennifer A. Burnett, MS, MD, FAAFP
Asst Prof. of Family & Community Medicine
UCSF-Fresno
Harold Becker, Author and Founder of "The Love Foundation"
(www.thelovefoundation.com)
 | A rare gem that truly opens our hearts and minds at the deepest levels, The Color of Sunlight is a genuine story of unconditional love. Engaging, educating and inspiring, each page reveals the tender love and acceptance so vital to our beautifully diverse human journey. Filled with courage, strength and honesty, this book dares to connect us one and all on a profound universal level. |
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